So here I am again at midnight something trying to get the energy to take a sleeping pill so I don’t sit up all night staring at the walls and barely focusing on supernatural in the background. I can’t get the energy and in all honesty I most likely won’t and will stay up until 8 or 9am like I did yesterday. I just lay in bed and stare at the walls or the ceiling hoping by some miracle I will fall asleep. I’m almost afraid to leave my bed because it means I have to throw on a smile and deal with people after forcing myself to get out of bed and get ready for work. It means I have to apply myself and do home work, make food, eat, stay alive. Those are things I really have no interest in. I am so numb to everything and I don’t even care. Caring takes too much energy. I’m going to be honest with all of you, I have thought about suicide. I’ve thought about it many times. I will NOT do it though because it will leave a mess. I don’t want to hurt anyone by killing myself and leaving them to put a bandaid over the whole situation. I don’t want anyone I love to go through that. I will NOT kill myself so please if you feel the need to be protective of me or anything just tell me your thoughts directly we are adults and I can handle what you have to say to me. I swear I’m not going to kill myself so please respect that. Suicidal thoughts do not always equal suicidal actions. Its just the depression trying to take more of me than I want to give. I have no desire to do anything anymore. My life is a revolving slide show of days filled with the same numbness and apathy on an infinite loop. I am so depressed but I can’t check myself in anywherre because I wouldn’t be able to afford the stay if I did. I can’t get the help because its too expensive so I’ll just lay here and stay at the walls. At least they are quiet.
The Defibrillator Toaster
My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”
“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!! NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”
He’s bread, Jim.
Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M
If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast!
“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”
I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS
HES BREAD JIM
To pay my respects, Ill be sure to place a flour on his grave.
I need this.
All of these comments!!! HAHAHAHA!!
This times a thousand. Everything eventually comes to an end. Don’t sweat the small stuff just live.
Standing trial for you sins,
Holding onto yourself the best you can.
21 days until I turn 25 and get to see Brand New!!!!!!!! We can officially start the countdown now right???
When I die.
If my friends really love me, they will pay Benedict to burst into my funeral and say this.
Oh please for the love of star wars and everything I love somebody do this for me!